The Things I Miss

The things that I miss are

quite vain and partly selfish.

Sometimes I shame myself for not being more excited

to give up these things, for the other.

I miss the feeling of being completely myself

Control (a false sense, of course).

High-waisted jeans; feeling moderately sexy.

I miss the sense of knowing what tomorrow will bring

before it comes.

The feeling that life will continue on like this

and that I could live in this part of it forever.

If I wasn’t pregnant, there would be other things I would miss…

The daily learnings of life that force

a deepened sense of identity.

Feeling like a woman; empowered day-by-day.

A new sense of maturity and a new season.

Stepping into a part of me I don't yet know.

So perhaps I wouldn’t give up the things I miss for what I have

But I’m still allowed to gaze jealously

at all the girls in bikinis and crop tops

free-flowing in the wind without a care in the world.

Right?!