In the Redwoods

Last Friday, I was here.

Glorify

Tomorrow I head to the dreamy Pacific Northwest on a last-minute-6-day-hiking-backpacking-cycling vacay. Did I know I was going a week ago? Nope. But I hoped and prayed for an opportunity to travel this summer... and it somehow shows up in the form of Portland & San Fran. Not the original summer exotic foreign vision... but yet, even better.

Beauties at the beach. These friends remind me of God's creativity & faithfulness.
He granted me these treasured friendships that bring so much encouragement to my soul.

And I forget that God works in this way. I forget how often I take the reins on piecing things together, creating excitement around a path I'll take, or decision, or last-min option... I like to be in control of the adventures, formulating dreams and chasing them as they take shape in reality. 

But I return to the raw truth of every ambition, goal, dream in life... of every great adventure lived and story told... they are worthless journeys if they do not magnify the One who gives all Life.

"HE is the source of your life in Christ Jesus, whom God made our wisdom and our righteousness and sanctification and redemption. Therefore, as it is written, "Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord." :: 1 Cor 1:30

This dear Jackie is engaged! Her story of how she met John on a spontaneous solo Greek Isle cruise is testament to the fullness of life He wants us to live... greater than our dreams for our life are HIS dreams.

Can I give credit to any of life's twists & turns... risks & rewards... questions & answers... to my own wisdom or discernment or abilities? Are these mine to claim of my own doing? Each emulation of delight, peace, & joy has been in acknowledging "it had to be God." Chance happenings. Random conversations. He brings me to a point where my response can only be to glorify Him; the work HE is doing in my life is only, fully, wholly HIM. One step that leads to the next and then the next, until I'm on a road I never suspected or conjured in my mind... yet it turns out better than my imagination. It soars past my own plans. Some blessings only noticed in hindsight, others more obviously Him.

He has brought restoration and healing to brokenness in my family. I adore them.
Thank you God.

When He gives us these glimpses, it builds faith to trust Him, walk with Him, and know Him more deeply... to say Yes & Amen to where He leads. To boast in HIM, not ourselves. To let HIM claim the story He is writing through us... no matter how hard we try to make it the best thriller, mystery, or drama. The response is "Thank you God for the grace to live this adventure with you."

So Lindsay & I are flying standby before the sun comes up tomorrow morn to Portland to spend a few nights in a treehouse, bike some trails, rent a car and drive the coast down to San Fran for the next week. Giving thanks for this friend who loves jumping into the unknown with me and figuring it out as we go... acknowledging that all things beautiful in this life are to give HIM the glory, not us.

Going Through

Most of the year, this is what life looks like:

Mayhem.

Books spilling, kids chatting, parents asking...

Project making, glue flying, painty hands/feet/hair.

it's a high-speed, fast-motion sprint from 7:30 to 3:30pm. 

(until June.)

And then there's the Rest you seek and barely find Sept-May,

That blip on the calendar that seems ever so far away...

Summer.

 A picture of the peace I wish I could attain 

every day of the year.

Slow mornings. 

Quiet walks. 

Late drinks.

In a perfect world - it's sustainable.

But in real life, it's just not.

And to be honest - 

Good stories need the craziness. 

They thrive on the mayhem.

That's where life is lived.

I like that I can look back 

and see transformation in the hustle.

I see character building and relationship molding and faith growing hurdles.

Because this is what we are designed for...

I never want to settle for comfort.

It doesn't always come easy. But it's always worth it.

"We were designed to live through something 

rather than attain something, 

and the thing we were meant to live through 

was designed to change us... 

Part of me wonders if our stories aren't being stolen by the easy life."

:: Donald Miller::

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years

Day One.

With 2 months of freedom and limited plans in Summer 2012, it was hard for me to imagine this summer to stand apart from last. The agenda includes the same happenings and hobbies... with the addition of new summer reads and a 50mm lens with film. Biking & beach'ing are standard, as well as picnics and Music Mondays and visiting my friends with normal work hours.

Good eats, good friends.
And a projected movie in our backyard on Friday.

Activities seem linear, but this year summer life is strangely not the same. Perhaps it's new roomies or new Lily decor (?!)... 

but it's most likely that I have changed, opposed to environment or circumstances.

Although Chicago still holds some of the romance from when I first moved here... it also feels familiar, comfortable, and like home. It sometimes hits me that I am navigating the streets without being fed directions; finding shortcuts and noticing new ways to get places. I will go out of my way to shop at my favorite Jewel or Trader Joe's, and know which underpass is the best to get to the beach. I go to one branch of the Chicago Public Library for their biography selection, and a different location for their books on CD. I am eager to window shop on Southport, and real shop along North Ave. I recognize people from the gym or improv or Missio Dei... sometimes forgetting names, but mostly knowing faces. When we have people over, we know who will show up and who will flake. When I escape the city to the burbs, I long to be back here again because it is the place I have staked as Home, and sometimes it feels like it more so than Deerfield. My roommates are the family I come home to, and this street is my neighborhood.

Jessica & Ashley. Beach'ing. Everyday.

Last year, summer here felt like Vacation... the festivals, food, music, & patios all discovered with the zeal of new adventures. This year, I'm noticing summer feels more like regular life... with added free time.

Tiffany at all day vball on Sat.

No matter how hard you work at it, I think this happens over time. It happens when a place becomes Yours. It happens when you create a Home.... You have to work harder at the day-to-day delight and excitement that comes easily at first, but fades with familiarity. In a sense, the honeymoon with Chicago is over, but I am also entering a new place of rest in this city... a deeper appreciation and heart for this place. It is a Rest that comes with my first year of full-time salaried work complete, the peace of no longer searching for a church that feels like Me, and the intimacy of friendships that do not remain surface level, but rather feel like old friends. This is so much more real life than anything else. 

Ravinia people at the Metra stop. 

Iron & Wine show

The Walgreens photo lady was shocked to hear I wanted to keep the above images, assuming I would toss them due to discoloration and overexposure. (apparently the light meter is a necessary working part of the camera...).

But I kind of love them anyways.

Done.

Maybe next year I'll be more organized... Maybe.

From our last day of school to packing up the classroom,

to in-services and meetings and end-of-year checklists, 

to cleaning and organizing and shelving and 

unloading, reloading... moving, storing, sorting...

and even... dare I say... 

planning for next school year,

these past few weeks have been a whirlwind.

End-of-Year notes.

Each year in June, I wonder - how can I do this again?! 

But in those last moments of sweet goodbyes, big hugs, & handwritten notes,

 I know it was all worth it. 

It was.

An empty classroom and worn out teacher.
It's what happens when the kids leave.

And summer helps bring that reminder, too ;)

Note from the Teacher

9 months, 181 days, 1,267 hours spent with these little faces.

"I saw them wonder at God’s creation while observing our tulips bloom, and watching our first chick egg crack open. There were times that brought laughter to our classroom such as finding worms in a mailbox labeled “Pet Worm, Don’t Touch,” or the children “getting married” on the playground. I saw the children’s joy when we did 100 jumping jacks on the 100^th day of school, or taste testing for cooking projects, or celebrating Wacky Wednesday. I saw learning take place as they began reading to one another and counting by 10’s on the playground. I have seen them grow in their love for God as they spontaneously sing worship songs while we’re lining up, and through their inquisitive drawings and questions in their prayer journals. They have all grown in making peace with each other, working as a team, and learning personal space. Above all, they have been shepherded into the presence of God each day as we open His Word, pray together, and lay a foundation to see who He is.

Indeed, this has been a special class."

::Miss Goldstein

::End of Year Letter 2012.