Making a Home

Perhaps the thing I looked forward to most when stepping out of my childhood home was making a home of my own: North Russell Hall: Baylor University, 2004. Each bulletin board hanging was so specifically selected to match the hot pink duvet & pillow combo (what was I thinking?!); from the hangers in the closet to the mini-fridge magnets, my room represented Me in every way that it could and it was my safe haven from the madness of Welcome Week, Rush, and Making Friends. Moving from the dorms to my very first apartment with my best friends at B202 involved email chains all summer with design layout, paint chips, and bathroom supplies. Against landlord rules, we painted the space green, hung Christmas lights from the rafters, and drilled too many holes in the wall making room for DIY projects. Regardless of the hours of painting left in the hands of Candis and I to transform B202 back  to its original state, it was our Home together and we loved it. From B202 to Crescent Plex to our Tiny Spanish Flat to the Lily to my own Studio by the Sea, Home has been a place of best friends, community, and memories. Aside from friends and family, leaving our Lily home behind in Chicago brought the most tears and clouds of nostalgia than anything else. 

From the first step into the Idaho Casa, Ben and I knew it had to be ours. The black & white square floors reminiscent of the Lily, the closeted ironing board removing my darkest ironing fears, and the historic Spanish style buffet and fireplace bringing coziness and warmth to the spacious living area. We submitted an application at the same time as another couple, praying we could woo the landlord enough to win the place. The phone call telling us we got chosen felt like the best gift, and waking up in our home for the first time felt like Christmas morning.

Later we found out that we were chosen because of "our traditional values" – we are both committed to living separately until marriage. As much as I long to move into our home together with my best friend, I also know that this time in my own studio space is one to cherish. I always wanted to live alone before I got married, and I know this is the last slice of time for that to happen. 

Chapters turning and seasons changing is one of the best parts of life, yet also the most difficult for me. I tend to have moments of deep grief, recognizing that what I have is going to be different forever, followed by elated joy when I realize that what I’m stepping into is so much greater.

Recently we've been told by numerous couples to "remain in the process" and enjoy this time of Engagement. I know that when I look at Forever, right now is so short- I want to soak it in and enjoy. 

As we head home to Chicago/Indiana this weekend to celebrate & see family, it has already been highlighted to both of us just how lucky we are to have these people in our lives. Let the party commence!